Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Penelope Trunk Too Much Information - When Personal and Professional Merge in the Internet Age

As I just wrote about, I am a fan of Penelope Trunk and her blog Brazen Careerist. Her latest Twitter post was over the top and I still can't believe what she wrote. On Sept. 21 she wrote:
"I'm in a board meeting. Having a miscarriage. Thank goodness, because there's a fucked-up 3-week hoop-jump to have an abortion in Wisconsin."

She has written before about having an abortion but at least it was a thoughtful long piece on her blog and they (2) were in her past. It is about a real issue that does impact women today.

This one tweet is disturbing. I searched for her twitter name to see what responses she got to this post and I there were some people who said kind things like, sorry to hear that, hope you're ok, etc. while others felt it was too much information and disturbing.

What seems upsetting about this to me? she seems to have a flippant attitude about a serious personal issue, sends it out to thousands of strangers, and does not even seem to engage in any dialogue about it. No follow-up blog post, not replies to any of the people who wrote her (unless she did it through private messages). People have personal blogs and that is ok but it seems very one sided.

The other point is that she should be able to rest at home through her miscarriage and not working at an important meeting. Even if she was feeling ok, a bit of time off is ok. Is she trying to say, look how hard woman have to work or look how tough I am?

Why does she share these things? What is her point? Is it a cry for help? What do her co-workers and professional contacts to in response to this? I hope they give her a hug and offer their support but I am not sure. Imagine that you are in the board meeting and you check Twitter during the break and see this, what would you do? Ask her if she wants to cancel? Is this some weird game with her ex or her new farmer boyfriend?

Part of my beef with this is that you can't just say this without more about how you really feel. It is missing so much and leaves the reader with an empty feeling.

Then there is the whole birth control thing. According to Wikipedia, she is 43. She has 2 kids already and I assume that she doesn't want more given that she would have had an abortion had she not miscarried. Why would she not get her tubes tied if she is sexually active and doesn't want more kids? Even though accidents happen and smart people get pregnant when they did not intend to, she doesn't come across as very professional and smart if she tells they world that she got knocked up by accident. Would this make you want to invest in her company?

I will keep reading and following her but I wonder if she really needs a friend and some help keeping peace in her life and finding the love she needs.

EXTRA: Wow, I was quite surprised that this topic has generated so much interest. I posted this right after I read the tweet and since then, Penelope has posted a long comment on the experience on her blog (which got a LOT of comments) and there have been news stories and a she did a great CNN interview on this topic.

I think it is important to keep in mind that my comments here are not just about the one tweet but I follow her blog and on Twitter and it is in the broader context of her sharing about her personal life, her kids, her divorce, her farmer boyfriend, her sex life, etc. She got a lot into 140 characters and my reaction was mainly that it was was just a tweet and left me with so many questions and concerns which she has since responded to. It is not wrong for someone to write about a miscarriage or abortion because it is a real part of women's lives and a real issue in the workplace in this country.

I am am a clueless man and even though we have 3 kids and my wife had fertility treatments and a difficult miscarriage, I don't really know what this like to go through this stuff and I have little right to tell a woman how to live her life, what to do and what to tweet about. Penelope seems like a very thoughtful and smart person and her post and her interview expressed many good points, most women have had miscarriages and they take a while, you can't take 3 weeks off, no one should have to wait 3 weeks for an abortion.

I am glad that the CNN dude did not get into her personal stuff about her sex life, her birth control choices, that would not have been cool.

I am pro-choice and understand why she would not want another child and much of the comments and criticism of her is way to harsh. People are judging her without knowing anything about her and her life. Whether or not she intended to kick off a controversial fire storm, it is good that she started a bit of a national conversation about these topics. The end result is probably good for all of us and not bad for Brazen Careerist either.

104 comments:

Nic said...

Totally agree. I found the tweet completely in need of some follow up. Great post.

Anonymous said...

She is, sadly, pathologically addicted to attention. Nothing made her happier than generating outrage by being flippant about her reproductive life, which gives way to another blog post about why she's not screwed up (but everybody else is) and drives up traffic and page views, which is all she was after to begin with.

An Only Mouse said...

The sad thing about the tweet was that she positions herself as a "careers advisor" to younger persons who are just entering workplaces. It is all good to say workplaces are hard places etc but the subliminal message about unprotected sex is going to be harder to dislodge. She has also been sexually active with more than one person and if this is all unprotected sex, then that is hardly a great message too. I agree with Anonymous here - but I worry about her children. They will grow up and read all this. It does not matter what the state of "privacy" is by then; it is never going to be cool to hear about your parents' sex life with strangers' comments on it.

Anonymous said...

Here's your follow-up post: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/09/24/miscarriage-is-a-workplace-event/

Anonymous said...

I have NO IDEA why people are a fan of this woman. Every post is like this. Either she really has no soul/morals/common sense or she just makes this stuff up to get the attention. Either one is disturbing.

Anonymous said...

why do you care so much? Why don't you have better things to do or talk about? Why don't you have a life?

get off the net and quit crying about other peoples personal lives

froggyprager said...

I am glad to see that Penelope wrote more about her experience and shared her reasons for sharing; I would not expect less from her. I generally agree with all she said. Her post has generated quite a few spirited comments, wow. I responded mostly to just tweeting about this and not the topic and did not think it was “disgusting”. We all have a tendency to keep so much private and maybe we need to rethink what is private and what is not.

I think that many of your comments are too tough on her, she doesn’t blog about sleeping around and what is so bad about kids reading about their parents life and ideas regarding health and sex. I wish my parents were more open about this stuff with me.

Regarding the comment “why do you care so much? Why don't you have better things to do or talk about?” Ms. Trunk posted a blog and tweet about her personal life and she is a bit of a celebrity. People are interested in her life as they are interesting in the life of Britney Spears, Madonna or Sarah Palin. If someone in the pubic eye shares things about real issues in their life and these are things that people care about, it is fair game to write about it on a blog. I have read blog posts about much more insignficent and petty issues. Don’t people have better things to talk about than the Packers or John and Kate. It is a distraction from our lives and in this case is about an important issue. Why are you reading her blog and my blog about this if you don’t care?

kendallmck said...

If you don't like what she has to say, don't follow her. Who are you to judge? She doesn't owe you or anybody else a "follow-up post," either. Do you pay her to blog or tweet for you? No? Then STFU.

I'm so sick of women's health issues being so stigmatized. Thank Christ the internet is making it easier for women to talk about their experiences with pregnancy, miscarriage, and abortion. I applaud these women for allowing themselves to be vulnerable so they can help other women experiencing the same thing, and make it easier for others to tell their story. We need to encourage dialogue - not stifle it. We've suffered in silence long enough.

Anonymous said...

When are men going to wake up and realize that women can work through just about any situation in their lives? Ever tried having a miscarriage during a Christmas party? Been there -- and it's not fun. And you can't even talk about it. These are the things that happen in women's lives as they have to maintain the status quo. Kudos to her for putting it out there. It's the rest of the world that needs to realize life happens.

Anonymous said...

Some people can afford to take a couple of weeks off of work while they miscarry. Others cannot. It's not your place to stigmatize those who cannot or do not.

closetpuritan said...

Why doesn't she get her tubes tied?

Uh, maybe because surgery carries inherent risks, and she's 43--old enough that getting pregnant at her age is not a common occurrence for people who are trying to conceive, let alone those who aren't.

Lori said...

Before I read your post I didn't know who Penelope Trunk was so I don't know if she's constantly looking for attention as people have commented. If you feel like her tweet is too much information, fine, that's your opinion. But women deal with miscarriages in different ways. Until you actually have a miscarriage, don't judge people on how one should react to a miscarriage, where they should have their miscarriage or make comments about tubal ligations. I don't think you'd want me to blog about how you should go have a vasectomy, would you?
Enjoy the controversy my friend.

Anonymous said...

You are a clueless man and shouldn't try to dictate what others should feel or write about. What's the big deal here anyway? Why did you feel the need to dedicate a whole post to this? can't you find something more substantial and relevant to talk about than to spill your righteous judgement?

Anonymous said...

Remember that she has Aspergers Syndrome. People with AS don't really have much sense of what's socially appropriate.

KameHameYaaaa!!!! said...

Penelope is cool,sometimes she is right,sometimes she is wrong,not infallible but far more better than others..she has a talent for introducing other bloggers as well.
I care for her career advice.However she is not that radical as you might estimate at first sight.
I agree that the whole thing with the farmer is for promotional reasons.I also believe she takes an ego lick with some of her posts.But I hate when I listen to people expecting somebody to be perfect in such a chaotic concept as work..after all a blogger is open to criticism,a bloody hollywood actor is not.A blogger pays that decency.A celebrity doesn't.So let's be serious,let the woman have her pros and cons.
Cheers!

sasha said...

here is a site about vaginal diseases pregnancy and tubal reversal
http://www.mybabydoc.com/blog/

dog collars said...

Until you actually have a miscarriage, don't judge people on how one should react to a miscarriage, where they should have their miscarriage or make

Anonymous said...

I'm having a miscarriage and I am at work. Not everyone gets the quick and easy miscarriage that is over in a day or two. I'm on week 3.
I have missed almost a week of work and if I stayed home to wait it out while I pass the rest of what was left of my unborn child I would use up ALL of my sick leave, and my vacation. And it's only January.
Yes I can use FMLA but even if I am only missing a couple of hours of work I am forced to use either sick leave or vacation time for it. The only help FMLA gives me is it keeps me from being written up for taking so much time off.

Tubal Ligation Reversal said...

Nice sharing..i like it..i want to share here that those women have done tubal ligation and wishing to give birth again then they must no need to worry...
visit mybabydoc.com and feel relaxed.

best android apps said...

In a few short years, the Google Android operating system has gained immense foothold in the smartphone market. Some of the biggest names in the mobile universe have adopted this OS, and users are already in love with features it brings to the table, including an open environment, true multitasking and variety.

airport taxi in denver said...

once here in denver I needed a taxi during search I found this site
I enjoyed there limos and taxi services

Reversal of Tubal Ligation said...

Every woman has the right to dream of a child. Tubal reversal allows a woman's ability to conceive naturally without any harm. Although tubal ligation is considered a permanent method of contraception, but then you think you're doing something wrong and you should not have a tubal ligation. But do not worry, about 90% of cases, the procedure can be reversed.

best android apps said...

To make your phone easy customizable, there are some of the android features that you must add in your mobile phone. With the use of rights android apps and widgets, you can use your own aspect of user interface very customizable. So here are some of the best android apps that are must to have in your phone.

ground transportation in denver said...

I like this blog I just came during search of ground transportation .I will visit it again

4D Ultrasounds said...

You should definitely write more about this! Please!

Careprost said...

Thank you for sharing to us.there are many person searching about that now they will find enough resources by your post.I would like to join your blog anyway so please continue sharing with us

birthday party characters said...

information well and good ... I like your way of thinking.
Thanks for sharing

Limousine service in denver said...

Nice posts...
Finding a taxi on the airport which is so difficult some time.
some time you are in much emergency and also late at that time you think that your flight will be miss.
you don't worry about that. " airport taxi in denver " which can provide you wonderful services.

Limousine service in denver said...

Nice Posts, i like much.Thanks for share.

Cleaning products said...

Some people think they are doing a good thing by keeping their home free of dust and dirt. In many cases, they can actually be harming themselves, their loved ones, and the environment.

home products
energy drinks
vitamin supplements
Cleaning products

Natural Vitamins Supplements said...

Some time we are very concerned about our health, we do not understand what to do ... It's very easy to make better health. we must use Natural vitamins Supplements. Vitamins function in many metabolic reactions which take place as food is utilized in the body, Vitamins control metabolism and energy of our body.

デトルシトール said...

Really nice job,There are many people searching about that now they will find enough sources by your tips.

kids birthday party games said...

Its really a good read for me....I want to share here a memorable day.its my lovely day when i was 7 year old and my mom organize a birthday party...she gets kids birthday party ideas from kidsfairyland.com/

tubal reversal surgery said...

Here is useful info about Tubal Reversal Surgery.
Tubal ligation surgery is very common for many women to have if they decide they have had their last child. However, some women will decide that they made a mistake and would like to have more children. When this happens, they might learn that there is another option called tubal reversal surgery. There are costs associated with having this procedure done which is why the topic of tubal reversal funding often comes up.

Careprost said...

Excellently written article, if only all bloggers offered the same level of content as you, the internet would be a much better place. Please keep it up!,

Free Classified Ads said...

As usual i am searching some useful information, immediately i found this post and gain some useful information great work such a great brain to use.

3d ultrasounds said...

Cool, it comprises a set of views that humans are purely natural phenomena, sophisticated beings that evolved to our present state through natural mechanisms such as evolution

website design perth said...

Love your blog! Its nice to read reviews of true natural products from someone you can really trust! Also love vapour. I would love for you to review the new liquid foundation.

Cheap wedding dresses said...

Very happy to see your article, I very much to like and agree with your point of view. Thank you for sharing. At the same time,i love best pram very much .Welcome to look at my website and blog articles.Hope we can become good friends, and exchange and to help each other! Thanks!!

viagra side effects said...

Thank You a ton for writing such a wonderful piece of information. Keep sharing such ideas in the future as well. This was actually what I was looking for, and I am glad to came here! Thanks for sharing the such information with us.

kamagra said...

I wonder how you got so good. This is really a fascinating blog, lots of stuff that I can get into. One thing I just want to say is that your Blog is so perfect!

Cialis said...

I wonder how you got so good. This is really a fascinating blog, lots of stuff that I can get into. One thing I just want to say is that your Blog is so perfect!

organic supplements said...

Excellent article that will provide the incentive and basis for my works. I wonder if I can mention the article as a bibliographic reference in my work. Thanks!

SEO Services India said...

I’ll be back soon on your site again so please continue sharing your great tips.

WYNDHAM HOTEL PHOENIX said...

This is simply adorable! I'm sure they would be so interesting! Thanks to the author.

Buy Valium Online said...

With the many blogs which I have encountered, I never expected to see a very beautiful post online..After reading this one, I felt so lucky to see its content..-)

energy supplemetns said...

nice to see it thanks for sharing it

buy adderall online said...

I was working and suddenly I visits your site frequently and recommended it to me to read also. The writing style is superior and the content is relevant. Thanks for the insight you provide the readers!

organic vitamins said...

I was working and suddenly I visits your site frequently and recommended it to me to read also. The writing style is superior and the content is relevant. Thanks for the insight you provide the readers!

natural supplements said...

I am very happy to be here because this is a very good site that provides lots of information about the topics covered in depth. Im glad to see that people are actually writing about this issue in such a smart way, showing us all different sides to it. Please keep it up. I cant wait to read whats next.

buy percocet online said...

Very efficiently written information. It will be beneficial to anybody who utilizes it, including me. Keep up the good work. For sure i will check out more posts. This site seems to get a good amount of visitors.

melbourne 24/7 computer support said...

I think the natural and biological sources of vitamins and minerals are best compared with other packaging and plastic products. Always try to push things you need in your home. It is not only going to be cheaper, but it will be much more beneficial to your health and your family.

buy medicine said...

Wow!! What a great writing, really I appreciate such kind of topics. It will be very helpful for us. Waiting for more articles, blogs like this. I’m going bookmark your blog for future reference. Thanks a lot for sharing this. 

London Crumpet said...

London escorts directory London Crumpet is created to expose Independent escorts and escort agencies in London. Everybody can post their advert on this directory for FREE.

London Oriental Escorts said...

London Asian Escorts is an Asian and Oriental escort agency operating in Central London. The agency provides escort service for a true gentlemen. Our escort models are carefully selected and are genuine.

ashishmaihu said...

Thank you for for sharing so great thing to us. I definitely enjoying every little bit of it I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you post nice post, thanks for sharing.
modern furniture for living room

Rohail latif said...

Hi! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a team of volunteers and new initiatives in the same niche. Blog gave us useful information to work. You have done an amazing job!

roadside assistance in richardson

John kim said...

Sometimes we are very concerned about our health, do not understand what to do. It is very easy to make better health. the use of natural vitamin supplements. Vitamins function in many metabolic reactions that occur in foods consumed in the body, control of vitamins and energy metabolism of our body.

towing company addison

Washington dc locksmith said...

Very efficiently written information. It will be beneficial to anybody who utilizes it, including me. Keep up the good work. For sure i will check out more posts. This site seems to get a good amount of visitors.
Washington dc locksmith

locksmith in silver spring md said...

You provided a valuable service to the community. Thank you for doing such a great job all these years.

locksmith in bethesda md said...

I am happy when reading your blog with updated information! thanks alot and hope that you will post more site that are related to this site.

jhon paul said...

Interesting post and thanks for sharing. Some things in here I have not thought about before. Thanks for making such a cool post.

send gifts to Pakistan

swarovski crystal purse said...

Really an amazing post thanks for sharing

Shootin Hoops said...

Hi! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a team of volunteers and new initiatives in the same niche. Blog gave us useful information to work. You have done an amazing job!

moving companies bethesda md said...

Wow, thats amazing.I love the way you write. Do you provide an RSS feed?

pioneer said...

I see the article quiet critical. Thanks for sharing anyways, nice to hear different opinions on that topic.
locksmith springfield va

pioneer said...

Certainly a fantastic piece of work ... It has relevant information. Thanks for posting this. Your blog is so interesting and very informative.Thanks sharing. Definitely a great piece of work Thanks for your work.
springfield va locksmith

pioneer said...

This is a very good story I wanted to read something like this approximately two months ago, please continue putting in here articles like those.
lewisville towing

HawkEye said...

The good feedback and do well desires are very inspirational and significantly valued.
Locksmith DC

DEWHURST TOULSON said...

Is she trying to say, look how hard woman have to work or look how tough.
dissertation example

abby brock said...

Hello, an amazing article dude. Thanks But Were issues in your rss . Dont know why Unable to subscribe to it. Could there be others having similar RSS trouble? Anybody nobody can assist please reply. Thnx!

movers in virginia

abby brock said...

This is a really good read for me, Must admit that you are one of the best bloggers I ever saw.Thanks for posting this informative article.

movers in marryland 

abby brock said...

This is a really good read for me, Must admit that you are one of the best bloggers I ever saw.Thanks for posting this informative article.

movers in marryland 

abby brock said...

This is a really good read for me, Must admit that you are one of the best bloggers I ever saw.Thanks for posting this informative article.

movers washington dc

abby brock said...

This is a really good read for me, Must admit that you are one of the best bloggers I ever saw.Thanks for posting this informative article.

movers washington dc

John kim said...

I really enjoy simply reading all of your weblogs. Simply wanted to inform you that you have people like me who appreciate your work. Definitely a great post. Hats off to you! The information that you have provided is very helpful.

dc movers

John kim said...

I really enjoy simply reading all of your weblogs. Simply wanted to inform you that you have people like me who appreciate your work. Definitely a great post. Hats off to you! The information that you have provided is very helpful.

dc movers

Download Need For Speed Most Wanted said...

Download Brian Lara Cricket 2007
Download EA Cricket 2012
Very intresting post I like ur website keep it up..

alinajiwarm said...

I just can’t stop reading this. Its so fresh, so filled with updates that I just didn’t know. I am delighted to see that people are in fact writing about this subject in such a elegant way, presenting us all diverse parts to it. You’re a fine blogger. Please carry on with it. I can’t wait to read what’s after that specialfinanceauto

smith link said...

I am searching for this such an awesome time continued back. Thanks for team!

manandwomenfashion.com

ali jani said...

Awesome! Just what I was trying to find out for! onlytechnologytrend.com

Abbie ji said...

After eight a few several weeks of preparing, I just adopted on the water. I adopted some advantage from your page actually. www.forextradingforearngain.com

ani moon said...

Finally my search has completed! A abundant bare Feature! Thank You SO MUCH! technology

business electricity rates said...

It’s a great site to see. That will help for improvisation of me. Will definitely marked as Bookmark.

business electricity rates

local movers rockville md said...

Certainly a fantastic piece of work ... It has relevant information. Thanks for posting this.

local movers silver spring md said...

You provided a valuable service to the community. Thank you for doing such a great job all these years.

local movers silver spring md said...

Great blog. All posts have something to learn. Your work is very good and i appreciate you and hopping for some more informative posts.

local movers fairfax va said...

Certainly a fantastic piece of work ... It has relevant information. Thanks for posting this. Your blog is so interesting and very informative.Thanks sharing. Definitely a great piece of work Thanks for your work.

arlington va movers said...

Hi buddy, your blog's design is simple and clean and i like it. Your blog posts are superb. Please keep them coming. Greets!!!

local movers in maryland said...

certainly a fantastic piece of work ... It has relevant information. Thanks for posting this. Your blog is so interesting and very informative.Thanks sharing. Definitely a great piece of work Thanks for your work.

local movers potomac md said...

i agree with this comment pron movies leave bad impact on young generation.if young generation do like these things then that nation not get their goals and not get development for your country

johny peterson said...

Thank you so much for writing this awesome information! Looking forward to reading more.
Rapidessaywriting.com

Singapore Corporate Gift said...

I enjoy spending my free time by reading various Internet resources & now I am very glad to know that your site is upgrading from the simplest to faster and synchronized form. Today I came across your blog and I found that one of the best resources available for free.

Laundry Leander said...

Thanks for sharing your idea with us...it's really a knowledgeable blog and I am very happy that I found this website.

Windshield Washer Fluid said...

Really i appreciate the effort you made to share the knowledge.The topic here i found was really effective to the topic which i was researching for a long time.

Ahmad said...

the blog is very interesting and pleasing me in the right way. I hope new posts will come soon

Jennifer said...

The exclusive blog you have arranged. I like it very much.

Amanda kennedy said...

This blog is really fantastic and informative for me
project management training

Caral said...

i like this blog I just came during search of ground transportation .I will visit it again

Steve Jones said...

A fluid, informative and a very good post indeed. I always read and comment positively on education related articles. Just to let you know that I am now following your blog. Thanks, Steve
MBA Dissertations | HRM Dissertations | Finance Dissertations

get rid of cellulite said...

I have to admit that I tried to find this information for a long time and I am so happy now finding it in your website. As I see this site looks really respectful so I will definitely bookmark it.
relatiegeschenk telefoon

Pool Services Fort Lauderdale said...

This is the first time I frequented your website page and thus far? I amazed with the research you made to make this particular submit amazing. Wonderful task!

Body Cosmetics Shop said...

This blog is very good and interesting. Today my friend send me this blog url by Email. You're a nice blogger. Thanks dear!

Online Fashion Accessories Store

Press Release Service said...

Hi there, I found your blog by the use of Google while searching for a comparable matter, your website came up, it looks good. I have send it to my friend. he is also looking for this blog. Cheers!